Within the last six months I've gone through several phases
of television shows, I've watched pretty much every single episode of Two and a
Half Men and every episode of Charlie Sheen’s new show Anger Management and the
entirety of Catfish however no show has entertained me like MTV’s Geordie
Shore. While I know I'm watching utter shit I somehow connected with it, I've
hated characters, laughed at their stupidity and seen things I’d never thought
would happen in real life. While I know a lot of it is staged for entertainment
purposes I've always took it with a pinch of salt for that exact reason, it’s
entertaining, then came this series.
For this series producers sent the gang of to Sydney,
Australia for what promised to be their most rowdy month and a half yet, what
we were left with was something different to previous series, it was utterly boring.
As ever there was the usual drinking, pissing, fucking and
generally “lad” behaviour by the entire cast but a few characters have been
changed. While it’s completely obvious that they are going to grow up and act
slightly more mature they've taken it to whole new levels, we've had Charlotte
find love on the outside world, we know this because she doesn't stop talking about
it all series, continuously reminding us that she’s over Gary. Sophie has
always been the boring character, her and Joel’s relationship is now well over
a year and half and they’re still going strong while doing nothing. A lot of
hype was made about Jay returning, he was back for all of an episode and a
half, not that any more time with him would make for anymore entertainment.
The big news is that Vicky is back on the market, she mentions
it a few times, by few I mean so many times I lost count. Being the Vicky everyone
knows and loves she’s back to give more of her opinionated banter to the viewer
during the interview sections. Now this being an entertainment show I believe
that no character should insight such fury into me as Vicky does, I've had full
angry diatribes aimed at this woman between me and the TV screen.
While all of this is happening there’s Scotty T and Gaz
fucking anything with a pulse every single night, while this is boring for the
viewer, there’s no “will they get some? Will they get turned down?” what’s
worse is that the rest of the house now polices them, telling them to stop
behaving like someone on the show they’re on. This rubs James up the wrong way
more than any other house mate; this escalates to James punching Gaz in the
face, something that could have been an exciting scene but ends up just being
the same old bang, move on to Vicky or someone talking shit to the camera.
This brings us perfectly to the main problem I had with the
series overall, the anti-climaxes we experience so much. One scene sees Scotty
T, Sophie and Joel visiting what turns out to be a nude beach; we see Scotty T
wander around with his knob out for around ten seconds then we’re left with it
cut to Gaz talking to queen Vicky about how she feels since her and Ricky’s
split for the fortieth time. This happens so frequently throughout the series
you’re left with nothing but broken hopes and boredom.
With a new series beginning about a month after this one
ended it’s clear that MTV are now going for quantity way more than quality;
with a show like this that has a very short life span you really can’t fault
them but you can question their dedication to making entertainment for their
loyal viewers, it feels a little exploitative and hollow in the end.
